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I’ve never felt an overwhelming sense of confidence before an important race or erg test. Instead, I generally feel quite nervous and uneasy. You’d think that years of training would help shift my mindset, but instead, it has only moved the goalposts.

I used to view this trepidation as a bad thing, a signal that perhaps I hadn’t prepared as well as I should have or the competition was too stiff. This feeling of apprehension is uncomfortable, especially because–having played sports my entire life–it’s not something I’d felt until I started rowing.

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